thoughts.

Mike is home (yeeeeahhh!)

And I am scared.

Of what you may ask? I dunno. Of relationships?

Last night I fucked up and told mike that I didn't remember his bday bcuz it is in sept. And I am/was still jaded by what happened in my last relationship, which ended last sept. He mocked me causing me to realize how dumb of a comment that was.

At any rate, I love mike. And he loves me. But I get scared. I am now worrying about whether we are meant to be. In my head everything is perfect. We have our issues but we compliment each other and I know we are a pair.

I guess what I am truly trying to say is that I need to let go of my past transgressions and truly kove this man. Mike is not holding himself back from me; he is giving his best. I need to let go of the handle bars so-to-speak and raise my hands to the clouds and close my eyes.

I need to stop feeling insecure. No sense in blaming any past relationship for it...I just need to get over the shit.

I love mike and I see this relationship getting stronger as long as me and mike BOTH want to be in it. And I don't see it any other way...