untitled.

weird feelings. i am currently @ the Hill uploading photos on f'book. i just left the mall. with a new job. i will be starting charlotte rusee on monday. this was exactly what i wanted; a job in retail. i have never done it and i wanted to try it. all my friends that have done retail hate it to death. that is fine. i really wanted a job that was the complete opposite of ERAC and c.russe is that. plus, i want to spend that xtra change on clothes and leisure activites. so with a discount i figure working retail would be the best for me. i am excited.

i am also excited about the estelle and solange concert on 3-11. and also dari's bday. her 4th anniversary of her 21st bday.

i am also excited about mike. he works wonders and he is sweet and great. but most importantly (2 me) he is a real muthafukka and i dig that. he is simple but not simple in the mind. he challenges me and he breaks things down so elementary that i understand it. and he never intends to control me bcuz he knows that drives me bonkers. i really like the fact that he keeps me sane and he knows he is to leave me to be me (make sense?) he doesn't force me into a label that is not assigned to me. like old man travis did..and all this of this scares me. i used to spend too much time wondering (before travis) whether i was 2 good for any man i came into contact with. and then post travis, i questioned whether or not any man was TOO GOOD for ME.
and now, i am positioned on the middle of the see-saw, trying to envision what will happen in this realationship. when am i gonna be at the bottom of the see-saw, comprimising myself for the sake of mike and vice-versa. i just dont want to be faint minded to think that this relationship is mos def going to end with 2.5 kids, two story home with a picket fence and all that laa-laa. i am trying to be real that if this shit don't work out, what am i going to learn.

but i am actually pushing to make it work. and mike makes me feel that my effort given is much recognized and i love it.